After reading Tiwa Savage's husband's posts on Instagram this morning and the comments that came following, I was tempted to join the crowd in condemning his write ups but on a second thought I felt he is not completely to be blamed - something prompted those reactions of his whether you say they are severe or not. From the recent happening in Teebillz's home I draw this argument and I felt it necessary to share it with the whole world.

My argument might not make sense to you but I draw some backings from God's holy word! Please permit me to also use this medium to this medium to talk to Women both the married and unmarried ones, who desire to be called "Mrs".

The worst thing that will ever happen to a marriage is when a wife outshines her husband. Everyone must not get married so far you can stay without defiling your self. If you think you are too talented and inspirational and spirited and anointed and blessed and etc, then you must not marry, you can stay single and build your life. You will still go to heaven if you please God and your reward might even be bigger than some men. But the moment you begin to desire marriage, this is what you are saying "I want to lay down my life and make this man become what so ever he must become", "I give up every of my ambition and my ambition now is this man's mission". It might be too extreme to say a married woman has no life of her own - her life is her husband's life; but that is what it is. God did not make the man for the woman rather the woman was made for the man 1Cor 11:8-9. Therefore, if a wife has lost her savor she becomes like a tasteless good-for-nothing salt which will be casted out on the street and people will trample on it!

The first ministry of every wife is the ministry of "help" Gen 2:18-25. If you desire marriage, you desire a life you must help. That is why it is erroneous to marry a man you can not help. A man you can not help is a man whose passion is different from yours therefore you can't help his destiny. You want to pursue your own passion thereby having multiple visions in the house which is di-vision and thus causing division. Any shining of a wife that is not bringing glory to her husband is a rubbish shining and that marriage will soon collapse. The Bible says one will chase a thousand and two will chase ten thousand but how can two chase ten thousand if they are not doing the chase together and in the same direction?

I weep when I hear unmarried ladies say they want to marry a man who will help them; some say they want to marry a man that will help them become great. I even hear some unmarried female music ministers say they want to marry a man who will make them shine! It's unfortunate that sometimes a man about to get married is asked how he can help his wife bring out the best in her, rather than asking him how he can harness her qualities and in what way can she be of help to his destiny, or rather, how does he intend to involve her in his life and destiny? Until you have learnt that the focus is not you but your husband and his glory you are not ready for marriage, untill you desire a man you can use your talent and gifts to help you are not a wife material.

Submission is when you have learnt to change the "me" "me" "me" to "you" "you" "you". Sub-mission is a mission under another mission! Wives are called to submit Eph 5:22-24, Col 3:18. Let people address you as "That great man's wife", and not to address your husband as the husband of that superstar. Today Teebillz is known as "Tiwa's husband", her fame is so striking more that his, she is seen not him, she is appreciated and her fans love her, she is a superstar and taking her carrier to greater heights is what is on her mind, and the whole world is expecting the man to be cool with it. She has more money and pays his bills, is this not turning things the way it should be up-side-down? I can feel his pains, i feel him asking, " where is the wife i married?" "I want my wife not this nonsense fame or wealth". Going from one show to the other without her husband, do you think this is going down well with the man psychologically? The next person that will cry out is popular bread seller turn model Olajumoke's husband, if she do not handle her fame responsibly.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not saying wives are slaves or rags that should remain at the back door, i don't mean men alone should shine and their wives should be hidden under dark shadows, I'm trying to say the work of wives is the fame, greatness, wealth and destiny of their husbands. Any woman that can achieve this is a successful wife and nothing can hide the fame of a successful wife. Imagine your husband reaches the height he wants to reach and the both of you know that your input into his life is more than 90%, what a great woman you are. Running after and achieving your dreams is a shadow comparing to running after and achieving your husband's dreams.

To wives: From today, stop dreaming, ask your husband his dreams. If you must dream, let your dreams be how to expound on his dreams. Pray hard that your husband don't stop dreaming.
To single ladies desiring marriage: Make sure the man you say yes to is that man whose dreams are what you dream so that you can easily fit into him. Make sure you understand the dreams and visions of the man you say yes to. When you pray for a man, pray that God will give you a man you can help!

NB: A man begins to die and will not go far when he thinks the duty of a wife is to keep the house alone and refuses to harness her talents and gifts. It is like a man who thinks mortar is for sitting down alone not knowing he can pound with it and have been using his teeth all these while to grind all his food!

Please also note that a successful marriage is not a miracle but the result of conscious efforts and selfless sacrifices put into the marriage by both husband and wife!


  1. I strongly disagree with you on this. It is people like you, with this useless ideology that try to turn their wives as property. A woman has dreams and aspirations in life, and shouldn't forget who she is all because she is married to an insecure man who cannot handle the wives fame. Time has changed, this is no longer the era that only men were breadwinners. Both genders have equal opportunities, any man worth his onions, shouldn't be jealous that his wife has attained fame. Preaching to wives to live their lives for a man is arrant nonsense, especially in this era that there are a lot of lazy men. Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, and this your opinion will only count for those who will forget who they are because they are married.

    1. Hello dear, first of all, I want to let you know that I am a woman and a wife and a civil servant and a minister of the gospel of Christ. If you read well my post you will understand that your point was addressed. If a woman is too spirited, gifted, visioned, anointed, etc, she must not marry;and she will still do well both in this life and in the life to come so long as she can stay away from sexual immorality. When purpose is not defined, abuse is inevitable! My dear, if you are not a Christian, this won't make sense to you; but this is the purpose of marriage!